The conversation around diversity has been intensifying lately, making everyone think about its importance in all areas of life. One recent topic of discussion? The iconic 90s sitcom Friends.
Quinta Brunson, known for her role in Abbott Elementary, recently pointed out Friends for its lack of diversity. While hosting Saturday Night Live, Brunson used her monologue to highlight the absence of Black characters in the beloved show.
Brunson contrasted the diversity on Abbott Elementary, which features the lives of teachers in a predominantly Black, state-funded elementary school in Philadelphia, with the noticeable lack of diversity on Friends. The difference was strikingly evident.
With her well-known wit, she joked: “I wanted to be on SNL back in the day, but the audition process seemed long – so instead, I just created my own TV show, made sure it became really popular, won a bunch of Emmys, and then got asked to host. So much easier, so much easier.”
While the audience chuckled, the underlying point was clear. Brunson continued, “It’s a network sitcom like, say, Friends. Except, instead of being about a group of friends, it’s about a group of teachers. Instead of New York, it’s in Philadelphia, and instead of not having Black people, it does.”
Her playful commentary sparked serious reflection, even from Friends co-creator Marta Kauffman. Kauffman has publicly expressed embarrassment over the show’s lack of diversity and pledged $4 million to support African and African-American studies at a university.
“I’ve learned a lot in the last 20 years,” Kauffman admitted. “Admitting and accepting guilt is not easy. It’s painful looking at yourself in the mirror. I’m embarrassed that I didn’t know better 25 years ago.”
She added, “It took me a long time to begin to understand how I internalized systemic racism. I’ve been working really hard to become an ally, an anti-racist. And this seemed to me to be a way that I could participate in the conversation from a white woman’s perspective.”
The discussion around diversity is far from over, but it’s clear that the conversation has advanced—even for a cherished sitcom like Friends.
My daughter-in-law brought my car back completely wrecked after visiting a friend – she refused to cover the repair costs, so I decided to teach her a lesson
“I’m fine, thanks,” I smiled, totally mesmerized by my son’s choice. “You look wonderful, Layla!”
At that moment, I had no clue how this woman would soon come into our lives and pull my son away from me. She seemed so nice; I never would have guessed just how cunning she really was.
Toby and Layla tied the knot just six months after our first meeting. I was so happy for my son as he started a new chapter of his life, and my heart was full of good wishes for him. I remember how I couldn’t stop weeping when my boy said his vows like a grown-up man.
Not long after the wedding, Toby and Layla invited me over to their place for lunch. I thought it would be a nice bonding session with my daughter-in-law since it was just the three of us, but it was anything but that.
Toby had asked me to be there at 2 p.m., but I arrived about 10 minutes late, and Layla took that as an opportunity to create a scene.
“Why are you so late, Jennifer?” she asked as soon as I stepped inside the house. I couldn’t see Toby anywhere near the entrance. “I’ve been waiting for you for so long!”
“I… I got late because of the traffic,” I stammered, taken aback by the unexpected confrontation.
“I don’t like hosting people who can’t value my time,” she muttered.
“I’m sorry for that, Layla,” I apologized. “But it was just 10 minutes.”
“I don’t care if it was 10 minutes or 10 hours,” she shot me an angry look. “You need to be on time when you come to my place, underst—”
“Oh, Mom! You’re here!” Toby interrupted. “How are you, my lovely lady?”
“I’m fine, Toby,” I said, hugging him, still reeling from Layla’s behavior. “How are you, my love? Looks like you haven’t been eating well.”
“Nah, I’m good, Mom,” he smiled. “What were you guys talking about?”
“Your wife was say—”
“Nothing, babe,” Layla cut me off. “I was just telling her how beautiful she looks today.”
“Yeah?” Toby’s gaze shifted from his wife to me. “My mom always looks the best!”
At that point, I was stunned by Layla’s behavior. Why was she being so sweet to me in front of Toby? And why didn’t she let me tell him what she had said earlier?
I spent the rest of the afternoon at their house, observing how Layla effortlessly switched on her sweet personality whenever Toby was around. But when he wasn’t looking, she’d throw mean remarks to make me feel unwelcome.
That day marked the beginning of my strained relationship with my daughter-in-law.
Then, one day, I noticed how Toby began taking her side whenever Layla and I argued in front of him.
“Layla’s right, Mom,” Toby said one day when we were at a restaurant deciding what to order for dinner. “We don’t need a large bowl of salad. It’s just the three of us. We’ll manage with a small bowl.”
“See, I’ve been telling your mother to order the small bowl, but she never listens to me,” Layla chuckled. “I don’t know why she never trusts me.”
She played the victim in front of him, and my poor boy always fell for it. I don’t blame him; he had seen his father always side with me. But I wasn’t like Layla. I wasn’t pretending to be a good daughter-in-law in front of my husband.
Layla’s behavior toward me didn’t change until the day she called me. I was genuinely surprised to see her name on my phone screen.
“Hi, Jen!” she chirped through the phone.
Jen? I thought. That’s weird.
“Hi, Layla,” I played along, trying to sound as sweet as possible. “How are you?”
“I’m good,” she said. “I was wondering if I could borrow your car tomorrow. Would that be okay with you?”
“My car?” I asked.
“Yeah,” she sighed. “Actually, I was supposed to visit my friend today. She lives a few hours away, but I couldn’t go because my car broke down. The mechanic says it’ll take a few days before he can fix it.”
“Oh, my! Sounds like there’s a major problem,” I said, genuinely concerned.
“I was so upset, but then Toby suggested I ask if you could lend me your car for a day,” she continued. “I’ll be back in a week.”
A week? I thought. That’s a lot.
But I felt bad for her. She sounded desperate, and she mentioned Toby had suggested it, so I didn’t want to let her down. I also saw it as a chance to mend our relationship.
“Sure, I don’t mind,” I said. “You can come over today if you want.”
And that was one of the biggest mistakes of my life.
A week later, Layla and Toby returned my car, but I couldn’t believe my eyes when I saw it. It was covered in scratches, dents, and dust. And the inside? It smelled like rotten onions!
“What have you done to my car?” I spat out. “What happened?”
“Excuse me?” she said, squinting her eyes as if I’d said something outrageous. “What did I do to your car? It was like this when I picked it up the other day.”
“Stop it, Layla!” I yelled at her. “Stop lying.”
“You think I’m lying?” she snapped, turning to Toby. “Babe, look at her! She’s accusing me of lying! How dare she?”
“Mom, Layla’s right,” Toby said. “She told me your car was like this when she picked it up the other day. She’s not lying.”
“Toby? Are you serious?” I stared at him in shock, realizing there was no point in arguing with them.
I had no proof, and neither did she. But Toby sided with her because he was so blindly in love with her.
I realized that arguing might even push my son away, so I decided to teach Layla a lesson instead. I spent the night researching online and stumbled across an incredible idea. A quick call to the nearby pet shop, and my plan was in motion.
The next night, I drove over to their place armed with animal attractant sprays. I carefully sprayed them all over their backyard, driveway, and front porch, making sure to stay out of sight.
With the lights off, I knew they were asleep. I quickly executed my plan and quietly drove away, feeling a mix of nerves and satisfaction.
I was certain this would teach Layla not to mess with me again.
The next morning, I woke up to my phone ringing. It was Toby.
“Mom, I need help!” he cried over the phone.
“What happened, honey?” I asked, feigning ignorance. “Are you okay?”
“We just woke up, and it’s awful here! The yard stinks, and wild animals have turned our place into a toilet! The whole house smells horrible, and we don’t know what to do!”
I secretly smirked, listening to him rant about the mess. The irony was delicious.
“Oh, my!” I pretended to be surprised. “That sounds horrible. I guess that’s what happens when you ruin someone else’s property.”
I don’t know if Toby caught my meaning, but I’m sure his clever wife knew those animals didn’t show up by chance. She had to know it was me, her oh-so-nice mother-in-law, who never fought back before.
Since that day, Layla hasn’t dared to mess with me. We met at a dinner once, and she didn’t try to be rude or complain about me wasting her time. Meanwhile, Toby started calling me regularly, checking in to see how I was doing.
I guess my dear husband Nathan was right after all. My son did need me to pull him out of the trance Layla had drawn him into. He needed me to stand up for myself and set a boundary his wife wouldn’t dare cross again.
What would you have done if you were in my place?
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